Comments on homesick home: Explanations of All the Seemingly Incongruous Cath...

Bravo, L., for everything that you have said here ...

2006-10-18T11:35:00.000-07:00

Bravo, L., for everything that you have said here and in your comments. there's too much here for me, noncommunicant and confused Catholic that I am, to address, but I wanted to say that I totally relate (like, totally) and that if and when I write more on my religious confusion I will be referring back here.

Anon, I didn`t say they were all opposed to Cathol...

2006-05-31T07:26:00.000-07:00

Anon, I didn`t say they were all opposed to Catholic thought, and didn`t mean to imply it -- I just said I was Catholic before I was anything else, which is cetainly true. And feminism isn`t opposed to Catholic thought, either -- some feminists are nuns.

I was Catholic before I was anything else. Long b...

2006-05-31T06:37:00.000-07:00

I was Catholic before I was anything else. Long before I was a feminist or an environmentalist or a free-trade and free speech fanatic, I was a newborn baby in a white lacy gown, getting water splashed on my forehead.

Since when are environmentalism, free-trade or free-speech opposed to Catholic thought?

L.,LOL!We don't need "cafeteria Catholics" around ...

2006-03-27T18:04:00.000-08:00

L.,

LOL!

We don't need "cafeteria Catholics" around to feel better. Besides, what makes you think that God's plan involves only his action? We human beings have free will, after all. As long as that's so, they'll always be stragglers wondering if they should enter the reception.

And blowhards that sound off about how awful the Bride looks! ;)

Holy Fool, I think God`s plan is to keep a certain...

2006-03-27T16:24:00.000-08:00

Holy Fool, I think God`s plan is to keep a certain number of "cafeteria Catholics" around, just to make the rest of you feel better.

L.,I admire your honest regarding your journey in ...

2006-03-27T15:53:00.000-08:00

L.,

I admire your honest regarding your journey in the Faith. The typical "cafeteria Catholic" I encounter dissents from important doctrines and claims they're still Faithful Catholics. You wonder how Catholic you truly are in light of your dissent from such doctrines.

Your commitment to baptize your children and raise them Catholic--and attend Mass--strike me as the response of a person to an invitation. Keep accepting that invitation. Who knows? You might wind up more Catholic than the Pope! ;)

My mother converted to catholicism on her 18th bir...

2006-03-27T07:27:00.000-08:00

My mother converted to catholicism on her 18th birthday; she had been sneaking out of the house early to go to mass for some time. She had grown up methodist. Later on, she tried a whole host of different religions, settling on Russian Orthodoxy a few years before she died -- she had finally found a religion oppressive enough for her.

My father was Jewish. Sort of a repressed Jew. We grew up catholic. (In French, no less.) Our job was to nudge dad if he started to snore during mass. I can twiddle my thumbs forwards, backwards, and in opposite directions. As a very young boy, I didn't understand why, since we were catholic, someone would paint swastikas on our garage.

I came to the same conclusion as Big Son, but it took me a lot longer, and I'm more adamant about it.

Hi. I am the commenter who is a priest. E-mails ...

2006-03-26T20:10:00.000-08:00

Hi. I am the commenter who is a priest. E-mails are welcome for questions (or rants).

I am working on a post to discuss what excommunication is and what it is not. (And why it is rather impractical with the current state of the Church in America.)

Oh, and Mary P., I took out the word "ideal" and c...

2006-03-26T20:09:00.000-08:00

Oh, and Mary P., I took out the word "ideal" and changed it to "great." You`re right -- it sounded as if I`m implying my family is less than "ideal."

This week I really learned my lesson about watching what I say when I blog about my family!

Thanks, H. Our church indeed does have adoration t...

2006-03-26T19:39:00.000-08:00

Thanks, H. Our church indeed does have adoration time.

And VMC, a regular commenter here who happens to be a priest said it`s more proper to call myself a "noncommunicant" rather than an "excommunicant," because no one actually cast me out. Since I don`t receive communion or go to confession, whether I`m eligible is a non-issue for me.
And everyone is welcome at mass, no matter what their status. Even non-Catholics are welcome, too.

(Yes, I`m a international free trade fanatic -- I`m not a Republican, but most of the Democrats` protectionist policies have mortified me for years.)

Mo-wo, I`ll do a follow-up post with the story of my first unsucessful baptize-the-baby attempt.

L, you may be Catholic, but you are about as laid-...

2006-03-26T16:50:00.000-08:00

L, you may be Catholic, but you are about as laid-back a one as I have encountered since my days working for the Sisters of Mercy. You are probably in the right place, SF, where the church has surely had to accommodate itself to the community.

But how does the fact that you are excommunicated (you are, right?) play in to your attendance at mass? Are you allowed the confessional? Are they welcoming of you?

Getting off topic a bit: You have mentioned previously that you are pretty-much a free trade fan. Are you a laissez-faireist libertarian or something, or are your leanings more toward international stuff? Tarriffs and such?

L, Thank you for sharing your life story so far....

2006-03-26T15:14:00.000-08:00

L, Thank you for sharing your *life story* so far. I'll be watching to see how things go. As I read your story, it occurred to me just why it interested me so much. My son is married to a Taiwanese girl and they have a bi-lingual toddler. Your family is very much like theirs. I would give anything to have their child go to a Catholic school someday! Your husband and my daughter-in-law have the very same backgrounds. I pray that my son will someday be drawn back to the faith he grew up in, and that our granddaughter will be raised in the Church. I became Catholic at age 30. In my 30 years as a Catholic since then, I have been all over the map as a cafeteria Catholic. (A lot of that does work itself out in time with prayer and age...) It is just part of the process of faith development. By now, at age 60, I am pretty much on-board with all of it and am soooo glad for that gift of faith. I just want to encourage you to continue going to Mass. It can't be easy to go by yourself so God MUST be calling you! None of us can know how our own life stories will work out, much less the life stories of our spouses, children or others. We might never know what our faithful witness and sacrifices will mean for another. At the very least, a home-sick mom will certainly find comfort and quiet to restore herself inside the building of the Church. Does your parish offer Adoration time?
God bless you and your family!

I will sound unreservedly bitter for a moment here...

2006-03-26T13:43:00.000-08:00

I will sound unreservedly bitter for a moment here.. Count yourself lucky to find a parish wherein you can park your cafeteria ass every Sunday. Not me!

When I returned to what I thought was my parish to have my daughter baptised me and p-man got the third degree. Basically, I was told by the priest there now -- not the one who married us... I needed to get way more catholic. Maybe I should take CFA, and what about p-man, they gave him a pass but then he didn't take up the membership??

This Father is really good at telling you what he likes and doesn't ... his Pharisee sermons are top 10! He would rather have 10 'real catholics' in the church every Sunday than 40 or 50 by topping up with my kind. It has been a very painful thing for me. I guess I had to ask... If it can be so clear my family is 'not good enough' why do I want this? Add, to this that I grew up in a family where all my Dad could ever do with his Protestant butt every Easter was whisper to me -- Hey, Padre, your purse is on fire! ... I don't want that for e.

It doesn't seem to matter to me how many times my Mom gets her nose up and says.. Listen he is a man, he is not the church; all that exclusion wells up and I'm paralysed. So I have languished on the fringes for a year or so. Gone to church a few times... Took communion even at Auntie's funeral despite the fact I have not seen a confessional in about 3 years. By the way.. Father really hates when people say TAKE communion.. sort of like I hate when he explains church membership.

Aimlessly ending.. I remain as always, thankful for the outlet opportunity! Peace be with you.

Being Catholic is defintiely a multi-layered conse...

2006-03-26T13:32:00.000-08:00

Being Catholic is defintiely a multi-layered consept. My mate is an ex-Mormon who now claims to be an aetheist. He has come to the children's Baptisms and First Communions but prefers to spend his Sunday mornings slumbering in bed. I can't blame him. I don't agree with all of the church either. But as you said, before I was anything, I too, was dressed in that white gown and having water sprinkeld on my forehead. I find a comfort in the fact that every Sunday in nearly every city around the world the same Mass is being said. In a life where stability and consistency are not a given, the same 52 Sundays, same traditions and even the same constraints are sometimes a much needed comfort.

I think we're multi just about everything and some...

2006-03-26T13:30:00.000-08:00

I think we're multi just about everything and somehow it works out.

Ray is spending most of his time over at my church and almost none at his. And I didn't nag. Strange how things sort themselves out sometimes.

I find the way you approach your spiritual heritag...

2006-03-26T13:23:00.000-08:00

I find the way you approach your spiritual heritage fascinating. It's intelligent, considered, and displays integrity. I'm not sure if "racial, cultural, and religious consistency within a family is ideal". (Not that there's anything wrong with such consistency, she hastens to assure all those consistent families out there.)

The family in which you are raising your children is certainly more complicated than a single-culture family, and possibly at times more confusing for them, but it is also undoubtedly richer.