Rodent Control (UPDATED)
Hey, I got a nice comment from Mr. V. Ole, who says,
I believe that voles are misunderstood. They are harmless creatures who thoughtfully aerate your lawn with their careful cultivation, ensuring generations of healthy above-ground greenery. For this vital service, voles ask little in return, save the occasional water-lily (they might be only $6.99, but remember, voles do not have pockets, and therefore do not carry wallets). And you, human- I mean, you, My Fellow Person- have been cruel to them. We voles- I mean, Those voles- did not deserve to be murdered! First we came for the water lilies! Next, we come for the house!I mean... good day to you.
Good day to you, too, Mr. V. Ole, and please stay out of my garden, or you will be tasting metal. Thanks!
Besides, it wasn`t any vole that dug up my water lilies -- voles are too small to have hauled out the heavy root planters, and they`re not known for their teamwork in lifting (nor can they rent tiny forklifts, because the State of California doesn`t issue them drivers licences at this time). It was definitely some much stronger animal.
Today, my next-door neighbor said he saw one of these. Was this sighting an omen, on the eve of my parents` visit?
By the way, Mr. Vole -- racoons and skunks are carnivores, and eat small mammals, like....voles.
Think about that, okay? *
(*UPDATED to add, I thought about this, too, and realized that maybe if I hadn`t killed the vole, the raccoon might have eaten it instead of my water lily -- so I probably managed to screw up both my backyard food chain, AND my rodent karma! I realized all that while I was reading the blog of my favorite rat lover, who always tells me more about rats than I ever hope I need to know.)
Now, excuse me, I`ve got to go clean the refrigerator, before my mother sees it and has a field day nagging me about it.*
(*UPDATED to add, the fridge is now clean enough to perform surgery on its sterile, gleaming surfaces -- but then I noticed the fish tank looks as if a sludge bomb exploded inside it. I toyed with the idea of telling my mother, "It`s supposed to look like that -- it`s a special algae ecosystem," or even, "We`re growing our own penicillin to save a little money," but instead, it looks as if I have one last household project to tackle before the mother hen comes to peck her chick to death.
Oh... sorry for all those metaphors...that must have been painful to read....)
I believe that voles are misunderstood. They are harmless creatures who thoughtfully aerate your lawn with their careful cultivation, ensuring generations of healthy above-ground greenery. For this vital service, voles ask little in return, save the occasional water-lily (they might be only $6.99, but remember, voles do not have pockets, and therefore do not carry wallets). And you, human- I mean, you, My Fellow Person- have been cruel to them. We voles- I mean, Those voles- did not deserve to be murdered! First we came for the water lilies! Next, we come for the house!I mean... good day to you.
Good day to you, too, Mr. V. Ole, and please stay out of my garden, or you will be tasting metal. Thanks!
Besides, it wasn`t any vole that dug up my water lilies -- voles are too small to have hauled out the heavy root planters, and they`re not known for their teamwork in lifting (nor can they rent tiny forklifts, because the State of California doesn`t issue them drivers licences at this time). It was definitely some much stronger animal.
Today, my next-door neighbor said he saw one of these. Was this sighting an omen, on the eve of my parents` visit?
By the way, Mr. Vole -- racoons and skunks are carnivores, and eat small mammals, like....voles.
Think about that, okay? *
(*UPDATED to add, I thought about this, too, and realized that maybe if I hadn`t killed the vole, the raccoon might have eaten it instead of my water lily -- so I probably managed to screw up both my backyard food chain, AND my rodent karma! I realized all that while I was reading the blog of my favorite rat lover, who always tells me more about rats than I ever hope I need to know.)
Now, excuse me, I`ve got to go clean the refrigerator, before my mother sees it and has a field day nagging me about it.*
(*UPDATED to add, the fridge is now clean enough to perform surgery on its sterile, gleaming surfaces -- but then I noticed the fish tank looks as if a sludge bomb exploded inside it. I toyed with the idea of telling my mother, "It`s supposed to look like that -- it`s a special algae ecosystem," or even, "We`re growing our own penicillin to save a little money," but instead, it looks as if I have one last household project to tackle before the mother hen comes to peck her chick to death.
Oh... sorry for all those metaphors...that must have been painful to read....)
posted by L. at 6:57 PM
3 Comments:
If you should spot another one of "those", I'd suggest you leave your shovel in the house.
Good luck with your visitors. I'm always around if you feel like screaming.
you crack me up!! thank you! LOL
don't let the hens get you down...
Mr. V. Ole couldn't possibly have anything to do with your favorite rat lover, could he?
Post a Comment
<< Home